Bloody Knuckles.

I'm not having
a very good day.

School went by
wayy to slow.
It also sucked balls.

I get home
and I fall down
my staircase
and hit my head
really hard.
I now have a welt
on my forehead
and it's throbbing
to the touch.
This wouldn't of happened
if my damn mother
would of just let me
go to Nick's house
with him and Matthew.

I think my
depression is back.

:[
Ciao.

Apocalypse

I don't really know
If I'm losing my mind
Or If I can really just write
about disturbing shit.

Apocalypse;;
This is where society ends,
humanity dies,
Apocalypse begins.
The sky will turn red
from the blood and the flames
and all these broken bodies crying out in pain
Will fall to the ground, fragile, in vain.
Here God will bring down his mighty hand
and rain his armies across the land.

The moon was night
as the people burned
The flames lit up the sky
Humanity dies
The earth cries
as the flames engulfed the world.

hmmm..
I wrote that second period
In my history class.

Anyways,
Let's pick up on what i've been doing lately.
I joined a creative writing class
to get my mind off
everything that has been
going on around me.

I had a major breakdown on friday
and one of my few best friends,
Jackie R.
[I have two best friends with the name Jackie]
was there for me
the entire time.
I am so thankful
for my friends
being in my life.

Saturday,
i went into the great NYC
to visit my sister
who is going to
F.I.T
and we went to the
Photography; Photoplus Conference + Expo.
I swear
That place was
my definition of heaven.

Sunday was calming.
I won my Futbol[soccer] game
4-0
hoo-ha for me
being a good goal keeper!
:D

I'm Dying my hair tonight
for my halloween costume.
everyone is going
to freaking love me.

My costume is
almost finished
I just need to
spray my staff gold
and glue the cane piece
to the top.


sweet.
Ciao.

Schism

I have no idea
what this post is for.

I'm Hungry.

Ciao

Sorry.

Hullo.
So,
Today was a totally suck-it day.
Nothing really went right.
I'm getting sick.
Literally sick.
It sucks.
OK.
Moving on.
After my totally bad day
and flipping a shit
on two people
who really didn't deserve it,
I tried to apoligize to cat
but I sort of got
her window in my face
and an "I really don't care"
o__o
I sent a text
but she never responded.
Maybe I'm just a really bad friend.
ah well, there's something else
I can add to the list.

Nick came over
thank god
I wouldn't of stopped crying
all day if he hadn't
We cuddled up
on the couch
and watched bad TV
:D
He's a pretty amazing guy
I'm glad I love him.
After he left,
I just zoned out on my couch
and started drooling.

I went to church at 6,
and my mum picked me up,
with our friends 2 1/2 month old baby.
Morissa, she's a doll
loves to scream though.
she wasn't that bad
though, I am
thoroughly exhausted now.

This post is too long.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to bed.

Ciao.

Typical

Which does not fit?

a. I'm tired.
b. I'm stressed.
c. I'm sick.
d. I'm happy.

well,
it's true
I am all of these things
but I'm happy.
I did yoga today
By myself
My mum is at
her soccer game
and iam home alone.

I'm talking to Spin.
What a weird kid.
wait
all my friends are weird.

cool.
Ciao.

Patrik Och Lillen Vifta Med Händerna

I wish I knew what that meant.
Maybe Jackie knows.

Anwyay,
I have a cut in the back of my throat
due to my nails
and it's healing
and the healing process
HURTS LIKE A BITCH.
I can't eat
swallow
yawn
or even sing D:

Work last night sucked.
Whoever said that the generation after mine
was a bunch of whore-ish little midgets
Really hit the nail on the head.
The party was in a club called Warehouse 5
Really hot joint
but not for a bunch
of skimpy little 12-13 year olds,
trying to act like theyre 21.
My mum didn't believe me at first,
until they started acting like assholes to her,
refusing pictures,
and every guy had a chick on his lap.

SKANKS.

anyways,
Satruday night was awesome,
sunday night sucked.
Maybe today will be better :]
I've already done the kitty litter
and cleaned Remé's cage.
lets see how far it goes from here.


ciao

Lazy Fridays

Yeah, pretty much a lazy friday.

Anyway, today

has been decent

My father is finally in rehab

to stay.

he said goodbye this morning

Thought he was going to cry.

Ah well,

Iam with my friends right now.

Not bored,

but kinda edgy

I mean,

Nick hasn't took his eyes of the TV for more than 5 seconds

and his "hello" to me was

Him looking at the TV and muttering "hullo"

Whoever said ignorance is bliss

Should totally get a kiss.

Anyway,

I'm bored, and talking to Danny on meebo.

I wish I was at the mall with justin :[

He would know how to cheer me up

Maybe just like he used to in Elementary school.

Ah well, I'll see him sunday,

hopefully :/

I can't wait for halloween.

I need a costume...

BAD.

It's all hell from here.

My dad's in rehab
as an in-patient
He lied to the workers and said his family needed him
and he got kicked out
He's travelling to different hospitals
looking to be detoxed and put into another rehab.

I'm glad he's getting help,
but my family is falling apart
All because he started drinking again
after almost 20 years sobriety.

My mum screamed at me today
and hit my arm
Leaving a nice bruise on it
all while on the phone with my sister.
Sometimes I really jsut want to say "fuck you"
and walk out of the house
and down the street
and start a new life.

Either I think that or
"I really want a cigarette, too bad I don't smoke"


I hate this hosue more and more.
I need an escape.

Fuck it.

I'm getting so sick
I'm getting so tired
I am getting so sick and tired of living here,
in this house,
with these people.

I'm so close to death lately,
I can feel him.

My self control is getting weak
The attacks are too much to handle.
School is killing me
French and Chemistry
Are killing me the most.
I even do my work..

I can't do anything right.